We’ve all experienced it. We go out for a nice dinner, and our meal is spoiled by some screaming, ill-mannered kid throwing a tantrum, whose parents seem to be deaf and oblivious to his or her actions. Or else they try to negotiate with the brat. Something like “If you behave and stop crying, you can have ice cream for dessert.”

Sometimes, if you shoot them enough dirty looks, they’ll explain that little Johnny has ADD, so it’s really not his fault that your evening is being ruined.

How many times have you wanted to grab little Johnny by the arm and give him a good solid whack across the rear end, but didn’t, because you know you’d end up in jail if you did. Of course, any juror in the world would probably exonerate you if they had been sitting at your table, or else suggested you whack mom or dad instead.

I’m old enough and cranky enough that I have been known to tell a parent that if they’d just spank the damn kid once, they might find out that they are raising a whole new child. You can give a kid all the timeouts in the world and get nowhere, but set their butt on fire just once, and you’ll see better results.

Don’t try to tell me that spanking a kid’s butt when he deserves it is child abuse, or that it  will damage a kid’s psyche. My parents never hesitated to discipline their kids, and none of us grew up to be an ax murderer. Heck, most of us even fit pretty well into polite society! Why, just look at what a squared away citizen I am!

The owner of the Olde Salty restaurant in Carolina Beach, North Carolina got so tired of seeing their customers’ dining experiences ruined by misbehaving children that they recently posted signs saying “Screaming Children Will NOT Be Tolerated!”

While some parents claim that the restaurant is singling out disabled children, I love it! I’d drive 50 miles out of my way to dine there, just to show my support. Wouldn’t you?

Apparently a lot of people feel the same way, because Brenda Armes, the restaurant’s owner, says business is up. Gee, people want to dine in peace and quiet. Who knew?

I bet a lot of those parents who are whining about the restaurant picking on disabled children are the same ones whose kids’ only disability is ADD, which is being Absolutely Devoid of Discipline!

When I was a youngster growing up, we had never heard of ADD. There were spoiled brats, and there were good kids. In my family, spoiled brats were not tolerated. My parents never had to negotiate with me to tell me what I’d get if I behaved, because I damned sure knew what I’d get if I didn’t behave!

The way I see it, the restaurant’s policy isn’t anti-kid, it’s anti-ignorant parents. I wish more businesses would take the same stance. How about you?

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

28 Comments on Screaming Kids

  1. Connie Braidh says:

    When we go to restaurants we are paying for not only the meal but the ambience of the restaurant as well. A screaming child is NOT part of atmosphere I want in a restaurant. As a result I think the best solution is to talk to the restaurant owner or manager because the parents of the screaming child never seem to feel that their child is a problem. The owner/manager usually is sensitive to his customer’s needs and responds in a positive manager (talking to the parents or giving the customer a break on the bill).
    I just don’t understand the parents. They know the child is disrupting everyone’s meal and they do nothing about it. It’s called selfish.
    ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) is no longer used. It is now called ADHD-PI (Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder-Predominately Inattentive. ADHD-PI is of one of three kinds on ADHD. I am not going to comment on the “disease or condition”. I just don’t want to get into the fray.
    However, I will say this. My Dad used paddling twice in my life. It sure got my attention and I sure didn’t want to repeat the experience. In the future, I was careful to ask myself if the action I wanted to take was going to be OK or get me a paddling. The paddlings got my attention and sure stopped me from doing things that might have gotten me in trouble!!!!
    Kids need to know the limits of their behaviors. Sometimes a good whack on the bottom answers those limit questions really quick. We are not talking abuse here, we are talking an occasional whack on the bottom when needed. It worked for our generation and this generation needs more limits on kids and less permissiveness.

  2. Terry says:

    On the mark Nick. Screaming kids and screaming bewildered “parents” are two of the reasons we like to be in “campgrounds” best when school is in session.

  3. Being an old fart I just tell the broad to take her dam brat out side gets some people mad but works most of the time. Most of the younger parents never heard of a baby sitter they drag thier kids evert where with them

  4. Gary says:

    To shay Nick. I remember growing up; my behind was never immune from a good whack to keep me on course. While I did end up spending 28 years in prison, it was as an officer keeping an eye on some undisciplined convict. To which is why we have so many more problems today. Anything bad someone does today is due to an alleged disease or some medication there parents took in the past which has now caused someone’s brat to act the way they do.

  5. Tom in Ohio says:

    In my family love was handed out to two ways. We three boys were told we were loved and shown so by mom and dads being involved in our lives. We also received that love by being raised with manners and respect or we were punished to fit the crime. It takes a lot of work to be a parent and too many won’t take that time today. Freedom… thank a vet…kids screaming in a restaurant… blame a lazy parent.

  6. Barry Crocker says:

    Bad Nick for President!

  7. Karen Knoll says:

    I agree wholeheartedly with your comments! My children were never allowed to misbehave in public…anywhere! And they didn’t! And they still know how to behave in public as adults! On the flip side, however, we always make a point to compliment parents whose children are well-behaved. It is good to let them know they’re on the right track!

  8. Dale says:

    We were both glad to hear of this restaurant’s policy when we heard about it on the news and support this restaurant’s right to control their environment and that of their diners.

    However, not all cases of problem children are just due to lazy parents. Ignorance and insecurity often lead to these “lazy” parents. That being said, that type of inconsideration is not to be tolerated. When at Disneyworld there was a 2 year old in a carriage who was so tired he could not fall asleep. Instead of the Mom just holding the child, she let him cry and cry in his carriage and when we said something she called us intolerant and miserable human beings for not understanding that the child just needed to fall asleep! Folks around us looked so intimated – looks like many folks don’t say anything because they are afraid of being attacked by the child’s parents.

    Finally, the cost of babysitters being so high, that is possibly why these folks probably take their kids with them. I still don’t agree with that decision though. When our kids were little, we knew their attention span was short and we decided that it would not be a good match to take them to a restaurant until they got older. I do wish these folks would be less selfish and just forego dining out if the only way to go is to take their too young children with them.

  9. Dave B. says:

    Yep. kids will be kids, parents need to think of others around them. Problem is, we are a “me” society. People feel they have the right to do what they want and the heck with every one else. Next time I’m in a restaurant with a screaming kid, I’ll tell the parents to handle it or I’ll give them a swat on the rear.(the parents that is).

  10. Sandy Stoltz says:

    A true nightmare is to be seated in front of a out of control child on a cross-Atlantic flight. OMG!!! This child cried and screamed the whole trip!! And it wasn’t the child’s fault that the parent didn’t come prepared. No distractions, no bottle, no snacks and evidently no parent brain either.

  11. David Cross says:

    If parents want to go out to dinner, then they need to obtain the services of a baby sitter or learn to disipline their children. It worked on me and it worked on my daughter. When I go out to a restaurant, I want to enjoy my meal, not listen to a child throwing a tantrum.

  12. Alicia says:

    Now that most places are non-smoking, why not turn the old smoking area into a family/kids area and leave the rest of it to us that want to eat in peace. At least you won’t have some kid hanging over the back of booth and in your space. Not perfect, but would help.

  13. Tom S. says:

    I believe that these children do indeed suffer from attention deficit, but not the way that phrase is usually interpreted. They are lacking in attention from their parents. ALL kinds of attention. Love and discipline. Parents just don’t spend time with their children in what use to be the normal activities of daily living – chores, meals, shared games, reading or entertaining activity – Except for maybe the Amish. My grandmother had 3 boys, and she did not consider it unusual that they were all toilet trained before their second birthday. She lived with her boys 24 hours a day. While this was normal for most of the history of the human race, nowadays people shudder at the thought of being with their children for even some time, let alone most of the time. The consequence is increased immaturity, increased stress, increased tension, inability to simply coexist together, let alon actually DO something together. Just the opposite reigns now. Families are total strangers from birth. Both parents, IF they are together, frantically struggle to juggle odd hour jobs, day care, school schedules and hobbies / activities. How many parents today know the pleasure of sitting back, tired in the evening, and just enjoying being with their children at home? No. The home is filled with various electronic media gadgets and everyone is tuned into their own individual interest. There is no togetherness. If people are not together, how can they learn manners – the behavior that breathes, giving space and respect to each other? Just like society in general, human interaction of all sorts, even at the family level, is reduced to unceasng selfish competition, to the detriment of all parties.

    (uh, what kind of paragraph was that? My English teachers would shudder……. Aha! I have an out – stream of consciousness grammar – that’s what it was.)

    We would not take our children to a restaurant until they were old enough to behave appropriately for the environment.

    Maybe just my opions: Children who have learned manners at home will behave in public; Violence in a venue where adult behavior is expected, including spanking children, is disturbing; If you spank your children in public- and sometimes it is called for – you run the risk of being reported to social services and losing your children – yes, it has happened.

  14. Elaine says:

    We raised three kids and they knew that if they did something bad enough no matter where we were they got a swift smack on the fanny.Part of the problem now days is parents are afraid of being turned in to CPS for abuse. I have to agree with Sandy S that being held captive on a long flight with a screaming kid is just about as it gets. Kudos to the lady who has a no screaming kids in her place of business.

  15. Tom S. says:

    Sorry for the typos:

    Line 14, 1st word should be “alone”

    Last paragraph, 4th word should be “opinions”.

  16. Jerry and Suzy says:

    Bad Nick got no opposition on this one, certainly none from us.

  17. Tom S. says:

    Having said all that I said about parents and families, I feel compelled by personal circumstances to add that in addition to suffering from improper parenting, a lot of children today enter the world with biological abnormalities resulting from the alcoholism and drug addiction of their mothers. And this is not to blame just the mothers, but also the (often absent) fathers, because often mom’s alcoholism and / or drug use was aggravated or worse yet encouraged or even started by the child’s dad.

    We have 4 boys, sort of. Our 2 youngest came along just as we were about to become empty nesters. They are actually my wife’s nephews. Their mother is a midget borderline retarded psycho- and/or socio- pathic nightmare. Her estranged husband is an illegal alien who claims to have murdered his first wife in his home country of Honduras. Both parents have bouts of alcoholism and drug addiciton. Their youngest boy exhibited symptoms of autism since birth. He has been with us since he was born. Both of their sons have required 100 times more attention than our 2 older boys did. The youngest is about to turn 9. They have both come a long ways. We still have a long ways to go.

    I have told the extremely condensed version of this story not to toot our own horn, but by way of introducing first hand extensive evidence that there are indeed a lot of children today who start life out at an extreme biological disadvantage.

    Hey, I only have time for all this writing today because it is my day off. And, after 2 1/2 years of homeschooling, our boys made a successful transition to public schools this past January.

  18. Gina Ellis says:

    Before I retired from the police department I noticed that when parents cooperated with us and disciplined their kids in a positive manner, including a whack to the backside, those kids grew up to be contributing members of society. When the parents made excuses for the kids and called us (police officers) rotten beings who “just didn’t understand”…well I saw a lot of those kids wind up in prison.

    I’ve quit using several businesses because of screaming, undisciplined children. These include beauty shops, restaurants, and other service establishments. I always tell the owner/manager why I won’t be back. Some of them actually do something about it!!!! I saw one owner go quietly over to the mother and tell her to please get her brat and leave and not to come back unless she found a sitter. Yea!!!!!

    I’ve quit associating with people who have brats for children. I cannot stand them and refuse to be bullied by them. Life is too short. I will NEVER go out to eat again with parents who cannot control their kids. By the time a child is 3 or 4 years old that kid should be able to behave in public at least long enough for a meal. If not, then the kid should not be there. I sure won’t be.

  19. Tim Sawyer says:

    Tom S, while I applaud you for your selfless devotion to these kids, I still would object to having my meal or movie disrupted by them. I’m not saying they are the kinds of brats we are talking about here, but we have been victims of children born like this.

    A while back a neighbor (who has since moved) was raising her three grandkids that were born with fetal alcohol syndrome and addicted to drugs due to the parents’ addictions and the mother’s use during pregnancy. These kids were absolute hellions, screamed 24/7, destroyed everything they touched (including our property), and made everyone’s lives around them hell. Grandma was obviously overwhelmed and was doing the best she could. It just wasn’t enough.

    When I called the police after one incident, in which the oldest boy set fire to our cat, the social worker accused us of being insensitive and intolerant of the childrens’ disabilities. My response was that it was their grandmother who chose to take them on, so why should I suffer because of her decision.

    I feel the same way about disruptive kids in restaurants, movie theaters, and other businesses. I didn’t choose to raise them, so why should my dinner or my quality of life suffer? If that makes me intolerant, so be it!

  20. I got smacked around when I was a kid, too. I’m ok.

  21. Joan says:

    Couldn’t agree more. A little whack on the fanny won’t really hurt them. It is a “me, me” society these days. Just watch drivers. Another pet peeve is barking dogs that owners seem to be unable to hear the same as parents of brats.

  22. Froggi Donna says:

    Could not agree more!!! Nuff said…

  23. Kenneth says:

    I never got a spanking I did not deserve but I did miss a few that I should had gotten.
    There were 3 boys and one girl in our family.
    Dad worked in a copper manufacturing plant 5 and 6 days a week and mom was home until I was 15 yo.
    Dad would eat dinner in the afternoon after work and take us to our vegetable garden for “fun”.
    During the summer mom would take us to the cotton patch ” 35 acres” to hoe cotton while dad was at work.
    We worked played and grew while learning to behave and how give an honest days labor.
    My first job was at 15yo hauling hay for a neighbor at $ 1.00 a day.
    We got in trouble as kids will and payed the price.
    I would still at 57 yo would rather have my mother whip me that talk to me and tell me how disappointed she is in my actions.
    I have seen my dad pull a 4 foot pine tree out of the ground to whip my brother for his smart mouth.
    My brother is a retired shop foreman.
    I have seen my dad slap my sister face when she said that she hated him.
    She is the lunch room manager of our local school.
    He sat me in a chair in the middle of our living room and talked and whipped my but when I shot some old car windows in a few junk cars on our farm.
    I am a battalion chief of our local fire department.
    My little brother died of drowning at 15 yo.
    My brother and I could not save him.
    My point is if you discipline your children with love and understanding then a spanking or whipping will enhance their ability to understand life and the consequences of their actions.
    It will not scar them but help them grow and understand lifes lessons.

  24. Linda Sand says:

    The one time I spanked our daughter in public she and I both sat down and cried. Never had to do it again.

  25. […] does Age, Wisdom, and Grey Hair equal? This posted in one of the blogs I read – “BAD NICK” – This guy does a good job of writing and his short “rants” in this blog are […]

  26. Chris says:

    You are not Bad Nick today. You are Good Nick for saying what we all think and feel. THANKS!

  27. Excellent post!

    Tom in Ohio (see comment above) says it best:

    “It takes a lot of work to be a parent and too many won’t take that time today.”

    And that’s all it is….lazy parenting.

    We are very fortunate to be with our children each and everyday. They are very mature and highly intelligent little boys. We get compliments all the time when we are out in public on how well behaved they are. Karen Knoll, in the above comment, is one of those beautiful people who takes the time to acknowledge excellent parenting…thank you!. It’s all in how you raise them.

  28. Bullwhacker says:

    Yep been there in the presence of screaming kids. Not your typical normal screaming but “SCREAMING” kid(s)…
    I have a great place for them? I suggested this to a set of “parents” last week..
    Take them to McDonalds with all the other screaming kids and give them a happy meal.
    I will also remind you people be cautious when suggesting something to the parents of “SCREAMING” Kids. See the restaurant management first which I tried to do in the first place.
    This fine example of Husband/Father got up and started to approach me very very angered.
    He was carrying a steak knife in his hand. I stood up and flipped my jacket away to expose “tin” my symbol of authority and the object of force I am authorized to use if needed. I told him quietly to stop and put the knife down. I think he didn’t realize he had it and I wasn’t taking a chance. It was my day off and my family of six were trying to have a enjoyable evening.
    The outcome of this as previously mentioned is BE CAREFUL..

Leave a Reply