At the risk of offending some of my readers, I have to admit that I like boobs.
Yes, I like them all. Big boobs, small boobs, tiny boobs, firm boobs, not so firm boobs. No boob is a bad boob, in my opinion. I wouldn’t call it an obsession, but more of a sincere appreciation for the finer things in life.
I think I first became aware of boobs when that pretty blonde girl that sat beside me in the fifth grade sprouted them over the summer and came back to school a completely different person. And it made me a different person too. Forget football and baseball, I’d rather sit on the sidelines and watch those cheerleaders do their thing!
Now don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I don’t appreciate a woman for her intellect, her talent, and her personality, because I most certainly do. But I’m not going to lie to you, I appreciate their boobs too.
I’m not a complete letch, and I try not to stare, but there have been a couple of times when just looking at boobs has gotten me into trouble. Not from my wife, she doesn’t mind me admiring other women’s boobs at a distance. She knows I’m like an old dog we used to have; he loved to chase cars, but if he would have ever caught one, he couldn’t drive it.
Once we were in line at a WalMart somewhere and I turned around and came eye to boob with the lady standing behind me. (Sometimes being short has its advantages!) She was a tall woman, wearing very short cut off jean shorts and a very low cut top and some sort of bra that pushed her assets up and out in a manner that no male between the ages of 12 and 120 could not help but notice. Everything from the top edge of her nipples upward was right there staring me in the face. And I stared right back!
This apparently offended her, because she asked “What are you looking at?” in a very surly voice. Well, I wasn’t going to lie to the lady, so I told her “Your boobs.” I figure if somebody dresses like that, they want people to look at them. Or, at the very least, they shouldn’t be surprised when someone does. Yes, we’ve come a long way baby, but nature is nature, and that’s just human nature. Or at least, it’s this human’s nature.
So I don’t understand it when a woman gets offended if she dresses in a skimpy outfit and some guy notices. I’m sorry, it’s gonna happen.
Which brings us to the Royal boobs. What’s with all of the hullabaloo about Princess Kate’s topless photos? If you are a woman running around topless, you have to accept the fact that somebody may see you, no matter where you are. And if you are in the public eye, especially in a role like hers, you are brain dead if you think there is anywhere on earth where you can go and somebody is not looking! It comes with the tiara. It may not be fair, but life isn’t fair. Even for a princess.
As for that other Royal boob, Prince Harry, showing it all for the camera on a wild Las Vegas weekend, I’m sorry, but that’s just wrong!
Tags: being in the public eye, celebrity stalkers, English royal family, lack of privacy for celebrities, paparazzi, Prince Harry, Princess Kate, right to privacy, Skimpy outfits, WalMart, Women's boobs