Humorist Will Rogers once said, "I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts." If he lived in these modern times, old Will wouldn’t even have had to watch the government to get plenty of material. All he would need to do was log onto the internet.

I’m not sure which amazes me more, the fact that so many people have so much time on their hands to come up with outlandish internet hoaxes and half-truths, or the fact that so many people blindly forward them on and share them through social media. Here are just a few making the rounds this past week:

Pepsi, Coca Cola, and Fritos, depending on which e-mail or Facebook post you see, have come up with new cans (or bags in Fritos case) with a picture of the Empire State Building and Pledge of Allegiance on them but have omitted the words “Under God” so as not to offend anyone. It’s an old internet hoax and it’s just as false now as it was then. Every six months or so somebody dusts it off and sends it out again, and folks get all upset (again).

At the Winter Olympics in Sochi, American athletes were ordered by the United States government not to perform at their best to allow Russia to win more medals (33 to our 28) to appease anti-gay Russian President Vladimir Putin over protests in this country toward his stand on homosexuals. If not for this order, the current e-mail making the rounds says, the U.S. would have won at least eight more medals.

Oh, here’s an oldie but a goodie. The White House has ordered that all military veterans over the age of 60 who go to a Veterans Administration hospital with serious medical issues be given treatment that will shorten their lives, to help reduce the VA budget. I first heard about this way back when Clinton got elected. It is usually followed by the one that says when you go to a VA hospital, the first thing they do is ask if you are suicidal, depressed, or angry, and if you answer yes, the government pulls your concealed weapons permit and confiscates all of your firearms. I’m over age 60 and I’ve been to several VA hospitals. Nobody’s killed me yet and nobody has asked me if I’m thinking about going postal, or tried to take my guns away.

One that currently has folks in a stir is a report on Atlanta television news station WSB-TV back in November that President Obama is spending hundreds of millions of our dollars to save mosques overseas, and that one Cairo mosque alone received $770 million to pump out sewage that had spilled into it due to the city’s poor infrastructure. Actually, the State Department’s program to preserve overseas cultural landmarks, including historic mosques, churches and temples, started funding projects under President Bush in 2001. The Cairo sewer project, which totaled about $770 million, began in 1984 and ended in 2006, three years before Obama’s first inauguration.

I disagreed with it then and I still do, but it’s not an Obama thing. It’s a typical do-gooder project spending money in other countries to try to turn people who hate us into friends. It’s just one more example of how both parties screw the American taxpayer. Here’s an idea; how about we rebuild our own infrastructure here at home, where bridges are falling apart and highways are filled with potholes instead?

And here’s one the conspiracy theory crowd loves to bring out for reruns now and then. According to the latest tale, the president ordered the Air Force to drop a nuclear bomb on a small town in North Carolina (or Savannah, Georgia, depending on which week it makes the rounds), where the residents have been very vocal about hating the present administration.

The truth is that on March 11, 1958, an Air Force B-47 dropped a bomb due to mechanical failure while flying over the small town of Mars Bluff, South Carolina. Though it wasn’t armed for nuclear detonation, the 7,600 pounds of high explosives in the bomb left a crater 75 feet wide and 35 feet deep, destroying a house and injuring several people. Fortunately, there were no fatalities.

In the Savannah incident, which happened a month earlier, on February 5, 1958, a different B-47 bomber collided with an F-86 fighter and dropped a 7,000-pound nuclear bomb into the waters off Tybee Island, Georgia, near Savannah. The bomb did not explode and has never been recovered. Both incidents happened during Dwight D. Eisenhower’s tenure as President.

Finally, this started as a Facebook joke, but apparently a few dimwits who don’t own calendars took it seriously, since I’ve had two e-mails about it this weekend alone. Because he plans to launch some diabolical scheme on March 1 and wants to keep the word from getting out, Obama has ordered that all internet access be shut down for three days, between February 29 – 31.

And that’s just this week’s nonsense. Who knows what they’ll dream up next week?

Like I said, I can’t make this stuff up. But I don’t need to, because there are plenty of folks already making up more bullshit than a Texas cattle feedlot could produce in a month!

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24 Comments on I Can’t Make This Stuff Up!

  1. Bill says:

    Wow – it must be true, cause I heard it on the internet. Hmmm…..and not only that, they added another day to the month, just to make it happen!!!

    Either that, or Obama changed the calendars’ just for the occasion. I thought that Feb 29th only happened in Presidential Election Years.

    Another good one Nick, LOL, I always enjoy a good chuckle.

  2. George Cooper says:

    We must be on the same email lists Bad Nick because I’ve seen a lot of these. My brother is convinced that if I go to the VA hospital here in Buffalo I’ll never walk back out because he really believes all of the crap about them killing off older vets. I told him that after two tours with the Marines in Nam I don’t think somebody’s going to take me out with a bedpan!!!

  3. Sue Brownlee says:

    When my sister called to tell me about Obama shutting down the internet at the end of the month I was so busy telling her she was an idiot for believing he had the power to do that that it was only after I hung up and told my husband what an airhead she is that he started laughing at me. I asked him what was so funny and he said February only has 28 days there is no February 29 to 31st! Duhhhhh!!!!!

  4. George says:

    The Fox say that facts have little significance.

  5. Larry says:

    My mother-in-law used to scold me with “Larry,they wouldn’t print it if it wasn’t true”

  6. Bess Weber says:

    Actually Nick,
    I just went in for my annual checkup(first in Years)and was ask several ?s I have never been ask before.
    are you depressed?
    do you feel like committing suicide ?
    are you tired all the time?Do you want to sleep all the time?
    And more These ?s are new I have never been ask these ?s before not even when Pete was active military and had a secret clearance and we all had to have our records stamped as to our stabality.

  7. Marilyn Register says:

    Reading some of this brought a flashback : In the 60’s and 70’s when Bill was active duty (and deployed a LOT) the 1st question from the military DR’s when you went to see them for anything was ” Where is your husband ? ” I can’t believe I was so intimidated by Dr’s that I always answered this question. Not really relevant to this thread just a remembrance of how naive I was at that time.

  8. George Stoltz says:

    Nick,

    You just took all the fun out of it. Seriously, there are a lot of wackos out there — and I’m guessing most of them breed.

  9. Paul J Stough says:

    There may be something to this internet shut down thing. We are staying on BLM land north of Quartzsite. We checked in on February 15 which would have put our 14 day limit at March 1, but instead the host put February 29 on our sticker.

    That should keep the rumor going for a few more days. :)

    Paul

  10. Allan says:

    I hadn’t seen any of those you listed but I have seen others that looked unbelievable. I don’t see why people want to make things up when there is so many real situations to report on. President Obama’s Administration has been involved with numerous scandals [real, not phoney as he claims] that he has tried to cover up. The truth will eventually come out. It would have been better if had been straight forward about them from the start.

  11. Robert says:

    I hope you’re right Allen, that the truth will eventually come out. But I don’t think the truth is what you’ve been led to expect… And with the most obscenely wealthy and powerful human vultures on the planet pumping self serving propaganda to the masses via the likes of Foxnews, Matt Drudge and Limbaugh, and these crazy internet hoax emails that I think are likely propagated through them as well, I’m not as confident that the truth will ultimately prevail as I once was.

  12. Robert says:

    Apologies for misspelling your name Allan. I had a good friend about 50 years ago who spelled his name with an e…

  13. Bill Daines says:

    And the groundhog saw it’s shadow and we believe a rodent, 6 more weeks of winter, ya right :)

  14. Dave W5 says:

    Nick, I am surprised you didn’t talk about the prisons being secretly built across the country in far out places with the high fences and armed guards which it is said that the government wants to come in the middle of the night in Black ops Copters and take us to and also take our guns, Lol
    They are going to be so busy between that and all the VA stuff. Job security.

  15. Barb says:

    Like Allen I have never heard of any of these stories or conspiracy stories.

    I love it when folks like Robert feel compelled to turn things like this into political bologna.. Somehow all these kinds of stories are the fault of Rush, FoxNews and other evil conservatives.. Good grief.

  16. Bill Kelbaugh says:

    I get tired of seeing these things over and over on the internet. After 15 or 20 of the same thing, you start to wonder.
    I see the VA primary doc twice a year. I have been asked some of those types of questions. I don’t know if they asked everybody or it is just all the strange medications they send me for my advanced prostate cancer. My poor wife catches hell if I miss my mood meds.

  17. Robert says:

    Good grief indeed Barb… How is it that you look right past Allan’s post as he is the one who took the first jab and brought a political slant to the conversation. I merely responded. I’d suppose that it’s this same selective perception that explains how you have somehow not heard of any of the stories Nick mentions in his article. Good grief indeed…

  18. T.J. Lane says:

    Apparently it’s only political bologna when it disagrees with your own version of political bologna. Very interesting how that works out.

  19. T.A. Martin says:

    Ah, the internet, such a wealth of information. The Democrats are not as bad as Republicans like to portray nor are the Republicans as bad as the Democrats would have you believe. Many moons ago, we believed that Democrats were for the poor people (most of us were in that category) & we believed Republicans were for the rich. Today, most of us cannot be put in the “poor” category. If we know anything, it is a fact that the poorest of our poor are actually rich by comparison to many other countries. I voted for JFK many years ago because he said: “Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country.” Back then we put our country first, now we are putting our party first—BIG MISTAKE. Go back to the drawing board & let’s fix this for our grandchildren & our great grandchildren. Don’t hate because someone is rich (many of them gave us jobs). Also don’t hate because someone is poor (they have other skills & talents to contribute which equates to a fruitful, rich life). Be proud of our country once again & appreciate our blessings. My motto today, is: If it is not good enough for America and our people, it is not good enough. Bottom line is, we are too addicted to the internet & the lines are blurred as to what is fact & what is fiction. If we follow our gut instinct, we will have our answer as to what’s right and/or wrong & if somebody asks you “where did you hear that”? Just tell them you figured it out for yourself.

  20. Allan says:

    Robert, I did not start a political slant on Nicks post. I was responding to Nick’s post which dealt with internet fabricated stories of political or government acts or events. Others also made comments involving the President. As for your comments on Fox. I do watch Fox [rated # 1] like many others, because it has the best news of any of the agencies. All the them have some bias but the others often ommit news that does not fit their political agenda. I do not believe Fox mentioned or were behind any of those made up stories Nick reported on that you were inferring.

  21. Barb says:

    Robert, I don’t hang around on on the internet where lies and distortion are sent around.. I don’t have time for such nonsense..

    I also get a lot of my news from Fox news and Fox Business. Unlike CNN and CNBC, Fox they not only report whats going on in the world but invites both sides of an issue.. If someone sends me something political I learned a long time ago to check out the facts before I sent it on.. And no, I don’t use Snopes. They stretch the truth or ignore it completely. Kind of like AARP leans to one side when it comes to politics. Hence, I am no fan of AARP.. The only blog I read, is Nicks and one other rv blog.

  22. Robert wang says:

    For real unbiased news try Al Jazeera. Great depth. Snopes is my filter for most garbage out there.

  23. Dave Walker says:

    Robert and Allan Get yourself a Bus and you won’t have to sit and watch cable brainwashing news all day.
    You will always have something else to do. Just saying.!…

  24. Robert says:

    You didn’t allow the last post I presented to your blog Nick, so I don’t expect you will allow this one either; but that’s OK… The most adamant right wingers on your blog are unreachable anyway, in much the same way this article describes. You however I have faith in, and it’s for your consideration and contemplation I send this as well:
    http://www.opednews.com/articl.....2-494.html

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